i’m at my psychiatrist’s office and somebody upstairs is playing a very difficult piece on piano and they’re making small mistakes but i want to...
Holy frack! After lamenting over the absence of one of my most valued creative outlets, I am incredibly happy to...
sometimes i name animals i see at the park or on the street and then wonder how they are months later
there is a duck named jimby who i have to...
i’m going to start putting these behind “read more” cuts because they are generally longwinded and weird.
parts of my job that i don’t like
but really, i generally like it. i like working with my family, i like that my dad gives me time off to do weird things (even if it’s at the last minute), i like that we get along well, i like doing the weird, monotonous things that i do. but those things just bum me out.
i took a nap in front of the woodstove at work while sitting in an old chair from our dining room when we were kids and living on center street. it was sort of strange, to be aware that i was sitting in a chair i used to sit in when i was a little kid, when i would put milk in my salads (true story; our salads consisted of iceberg lettuce and cubes of cheese, and i always put french dressing on mine and poured milk in it??? i don’t know, i was a weird kid. i also loved getting ice cream floats from giffords that consisted of peppermint stick ice cream in orange soda), and now twenty years later, i was taking a nap in that same chair in front of a woodstove at work.
i had to buy new pants this week. work pants, but also some jeans. flannel lined jeans. i am so excited to not have to wear jeans with thermal man-pants on underneath them this winter.
i’m supposed to go to a wedding ceremony this weekend for two friends of mine. they got married in february (i think), but they want to have a churchy wedding with friends and extended family, andso they are having it this weekend. but the thing is, i don’t have anything to wear. so i have to buy a dress. and appropriate shoes (i’m going to guess that worn in, turquoise chuck taylors that are covered in writing would be deemed inappropriate shoes to wear to a baptist church). and give them a wedding present (fyi, i always give money, so if you’re looking for $50, invite me to your wedding). but things are really slow at work, and i’m worried about having to make tomorrow’s paycheck last two weeks, andso i don’t know that i should go. especially considering that i also have to get pellets because it is going to start getting colder and colder.
speaking of words that rhyme with music tapes lyrics (“getting colder and colder,” “grow older and older”) (what kind of transition is that? a wicked bad one), i was rewatching that nice video of spare the dark streets that gonzo chicago uploaded tonight, and i have always clearly heard the lyrics of this song, i have heard this song so many times, but only tonight did i actually realize the lyrics to the second verse are something sounding sort of like this.
all the railroads rolled inside
soon their steam fills all your eyes (fells o’er your eyes?)
but the thing is, the first dream happened before i had ever even heard spare the dark streets. i might’ve had it before that song was even a song. so. it’s just.
it’s hard for me because i don’t believe in coincidence. i am a jerk that likes to not believe in coincidence because it’s nice to think sometimes. you know.
i am still working on that song i last mentioned. it is becoming really questionable, but in a nice sort of way. i am obsessed with songs in 3/4 time. why this song has a time signature before it even has any sort of real structure, i don’t know, but it does, so okay.
today there were two seagulls walking about in the rain, looking for worms. they were sweet funny things.
i am going to bed now. i have been wanting to go to bed early for the past week and a half, but it kept not happening, but it is happening now.